You Don’t Have to Be Calm All the Time
Finding emotional balance as a pet parent without chasing perfection and trying to fix everything
Thirteen years ago, on the Friday before Labor Day, I was driving home from work on a packed highway. Everyone was rushing… some to start the long weekend, others just eager to get home. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the tiniest black fuzzball darting near the curb. My heart dropped. It was a kitten, barely big enough to be on her own, dangerously close to traffic.
I pulled over as quickly as I could, just as a semi-truck thundered past. She froze, still teetering on the edge of the highway. My biggest fear was startling her into the road. I eased closer and managed to flush her back into the bushes. She was distracted with a bug, and that’s when I scooped her up.
The moment I held her against my chest, she tucked in and began to purr. I thought I’d find her a home, but in that instant, I realized she had already found hers. The cat distribution system had worked its magic, and Tibby has been my little sweetheart ever since.
A Scare That Stirred Big Feelings
This weekend marks 13 years since that day. And while she has always been a healthy, gentle soul, recently Tibby started spitting up hairballs. The first time or two, I thought it might just be a one‑off… after all, hairballs can happen. But when it became more frequent, I felt the panic rise in my chest. After losing Maisy unexpectedly earlier this year, my heart immediately leapt to worry. What if something was wrong? Was I about to lose her too? Intrusive thoughts, I know but that’s where my mind went.
To be honest, I wasn’t calm in that moment. I had big feelings of grief, fear, protectiveness. And that’s okay.
Returning to Center
After I let myself feel those emotions and came back to center, I reminded myself that I do have tools to find answers and support her. I can do this. I ordered a comprehensive gut health test to see if frequent hairballs might be a sign of an unhealthy gut balance or other digestive issues. I also scheduled her senior bloodwork and thyroid panel with her veterinarian, wanting to rule out hyperthyroidism, obstructions, or anything else more serious. Everything came back beautifully. While I’m still sorting out what’s going on, I started adding marshmallow root and a digestive enzyme to her meals to help her pass hairballs more easily. And through it all, Tibby remained her grounded, playful self, including zoomies, spell-casting and all.
That contrast reminded me of something important. Balance isn’t about being calm all the time, it’s about being able to find our way back when we’re knocked off center.
Balance isn’t about constant calm, it’s about finding your way back to your center.
Balance Over Perfection
As pet parents, we sometimes put pressure on ourselves to be endlessly peaceful and centered, especially when our animals are dealing with health changes. But balance isn’t about never wobbling. It’s about having the resilience and tools to return to center after the wobble. When something is out of balance in our animals, they show us, sometimes in subtle ways like a hairball, other times in louder ways. The same is true for us. The goal isn’t perfection; it’s noticing, adjusting, and returning.
Our animals don’t ask us for perfection,only presence.
Our animals don’t expect us to suppress our feelings. They simply need us not to live in them forever. If I let my anxiety spiral unchecked, Tibby would feel it. She might even start to mirror it. But if I allow myself to cry, to worry, and then to ground, breathe, and come back to her whole, she gets the presence she truly needs.
You don’t have to be calm all the time. You just need to know how to return to balance.
What about you… what helps you find your way back to center when life feels overwhelming?
Resources & Next Steps
Here are the products and tests I mentioned in this post:
Comprehensive Gut Check - https://calmingcreek.myshopdot.com/
Digestive enzyme - https://twocrazycatladies.com
Marshmallow root (for digestive support) - https://molliesorganic.com/
I’m also planning to explore a few additional tools:
Glacier Peak Pet Intolerance Test - https://drruthroberts.com/glacier
Iridology assessment (I’ll be posting Tibby’s results after I complete this weekend—watch for my Notes!) - https://calmingcreekcompanions.com/products/animal-iridology-reading
Hair Tissue Mineral Analysis (HTMA) - https://parsleypet.com/
Stay tuned, because next week, I’ll be sharing something special just for cat parents. I can’t wait to show you how small shifts in awareness can make such a big difference in your relationship with your cat.
Thank you so much for reading this post ! Please let me know what you think about the post.
My name is Melissa, and I’m an animal communicator, energy healer, and holistic pet health coach. I weave together a variety of gentle, natural modalities to support animals and their humans including Reiki, EFT/Tapping, chakra balancing, muscle testing, tuning fork fascia release, canine herbalism, and both feline and canine nutrition. I'm also currently studying clinical animal iridology to further expand the holistic lens I bring to this work.
I live on a little farm sanctuary where I'm happily outnumbered by animals—seven dogs, three cats, and a mix of other furry, feathered, and hooved friends who keep life interesting. My approach is heart-centered and intuitive, combining ancient practices and modern knowledge to help bring balance, comfort, and clarity to our four-legged companions.
Thank you for taking the time to explore ways to enhance the quality of life for your furry companions. I hope my tips and recommendations prove invaluable to both you and your beloved pets. For more information and to discover how I can assist you further, please visit my website at calmingcreek.com.
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Disclaimer: The information shared in this blog is for educational and informational purposes only. I am not a veterinarian, and my services are intended as a complementary practice to support your pet’s overall well-being. They are not a substitute for professional veterinary care, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult your veterinarian regarding any medical concerns, conditions, or treatments your pet may require.
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"Balance isn’t about being calm all the time, it’s about being able to find our way back when we’re knocked off center." Simple truth, thanks for the timely reminder.